Marriage: Forgiveness, Grace, Redemption

     My heart is heavy these days as I hear of marriages in trouble and falling apart. It hits close to home, sometimes there is a visible building-up to the crash and other times it comes as a "surprise" to the outsiders. Last week, I held my eight year old as she asked, "If you and daddy ever get in a big fight, will you take care of it so it doesn't keep happening and you get a divorce?" Those are heart-wrenching words from your child, but her heart is hurting for some of her friends going through their parents' divorce.

     I think my answer surprised her. "Babe, daddy and I HAVE had big fights; you've just not known about them." Does that surprise you, too? It shouldn't. Andrew and I are both human. Read: We have flaws and struggle with sin. We have been married now almost 12 years (we were just CHILDREN, I tell you). Overall, marriage has been wonderful and happy and we'd both do it all over again - BUT. Yes, but. We have had our share of rough times, some brought on by others and circumstances, but other times have been our fault. Our sin. Some of those times were incredibly dark and we wondered when the sun would come back out. 

     To me, the scariest thing about marriage is that I can only control one of us. I can pretend to control Andrew and I can manipulate him, but that's not real or love. All I can really control is me. Am I walking with the Lord? Am I loving and honoring my husband? Am I encouraging him in his relationship with Christ and praying for him? 

     As Christians, our marriage should be a demonstration of Christ's love for the world. Our relationship should be a picture of grace and redemption. (See Ephesians 6.) Are we going to mess up? Sin against God and each other? Yep. But we can extend forgiveness and grace to each other because Christ did that for us on the Cross. 

     Unfortunately, our reality is a broken world. I've watched couples struggle. I've wept over friends' marriages. I've watched spouses do everything they could to follow Christ and keep their marriage together, but do it alone. People say it takes two to make a marriage work. I'd like to argue that it takes three - husband, wife, Jesus. In the end, if one spouse refuses to actively participate in the life of a marriage, it can fall apart.

     The good news? Christ offers forgiveness, grace, and redemption to everyone. Never been married? Walk with Jesus. Married? Walk with Jesus. Divorced? Walk with Jesus. That's the answer. It's simple, but it's not easy. If you are married, fight for your marriage with everything you have. If it's hard right now, keep pushing forward. Let God use you and your spouse to show Himself to those around you. If your marriage has been lost, don't despair. Allow Christ to heal your heart. Hold tightly to Him and stand. You are not destined for a lifetime of sackcloth and ashes, my friend. Isaiah 61 says "The Spirit of the Lord God is on Me, because the Lord has anointed Me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted. ... to provide for those who mourn in Zion; to give them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, festive oil instead of mourning, and splendid clothes instead of despair."

     If you have walked away from Jesus or have never turned to Him to begin with, 1 John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." All unrighteousness - doesn't matter what it is or who you are - because HE is faithful and just. 

     I'll say one more thing and then I'll hop off my marriage soapbox for now. Girls, I used to be a bit sad that Pinterest wasn't around when I got married. (Geez. That kind of makes me feel old.) But you know what? GET OFF PINTEREST AND GET IN YOUR BIBLE. In today's culture, so much emphasis is placed on weddings. And they are beautiful and memorable and special. They also last 30 minutes to an hour. Guess what? After your wedding, you have a marriage. That guy you love so much? Next week, he's going to make you mad. What are you going to do with that? Tip: find a couple who has a growing marriage and ask them to be your friends! Spend time with them. Learn from their mistakes. Ask them to help you through yours. Trust me on this one.

     The night Elisabeth and I had our conversation, Andrew was at Bible study. When he got home, we had an after-bedtime-at-home-date-night. That means we ate ice cream out of the containers and watched Newhart. We're cool like that. In 50 years, I still want to eat ice cream and watch Newhart with him. Bonus: in 50 years, we won't have to hide the ice cream and wait until after the kids are in bed to eat it! I'm looking forward to the rest of my journey with my husband - and I know the only way we will make it through is if there are three of us walking together: Jesus, Andrew, and me. 

Those Fickle Israelites (and why I am no better than they were)

I've always been annoyed with and flabbergasted by the Israelites. They walked out of Egypt with all the Egyptians' treasures, finally a free people. Then they got to the Red Sea and freaked out - because surely they would die, either in the sea or at the hand of Pharaoh and his army. So God parts the waters and the Israelites are again saved and their enemies are destroyed. But that wasn't enough for them; they cowered down and wouldn't enter the land God promised to give them because they heard the people who lived there were giants. And over and over it continued. God did big things, the Israelites worshiped Him, the Israelites had a crisis of faith and faltered. I grow weary reading it. And I can't believe how ridiculous they were.

I have come to fully realize, however, I am just like the Israelites. God has done the miraculous in our family. For us, it was as big a miracle as the parting of the Red Sea. But now I'm looking at the giants in the Promised Land and wondering what's going to happen and if God has this covered, too. Haven't I seen enough to know without a doubt that God is all powerful and all knowing? One would think so. But doubt and fear creep in so quickly and take root. 

God is not the author of doubt or fear. He wants us to remember what He has done and what He has said. I think even more than those, though, He wants us to remember Who He is. Christ came to give abundant life, not a fearful and worrisome existence. God has been faithful - always, but especially in the last few weeks - to bring to my mind Scripture I have memorized. I haven't spent nearly enough energy memorizing in the last few years, but my mom had a secret weapon when I was a kid: GT and the Halo Express. They are kids' stories with Scriptures set to music. I had to know all the songs on one cassette before she would buy me the next one. Almost without even trying, I have verses coming to my mind and calming my heart. I learned most of them before I was 10. (Moral of this little story - get your kids memorizing Scripture. Brownie points if it's to music. Bonus: GT and the Halo Express is on CD now! I need to get them for my kids...)

God has also given me a new-found love of running - and my runs have become time to clear my mind and even have some personal worship. If you see a crazy lady running down the street with hands raised, tears flowing, and lips moving, just keep on driving. I participated in a half marathon a couple weeks ago and decided to pray for people and situations at each mile marker. This tactic helped pass the time and gave me some quality chatting time with God. When my heart is focused on Christ, the fear and stress dissipate. He quiets my heart and reminds me of Who He is and what He has done - not just in the Bible but in my own life. My faith is strengthened by these reminders and times with Him. (Also, a run is a lot better for me than my previous counselors, Ben & Jerry. Mmm. I think I left something in the freezer other room. Be back in a minute.)

I'm about to have a LOT more praying and running time - I have registered for my first full marathon. It is the Soaring Wings Marathon in October and it benefits the Soaring Wings Ranch in Conway, AR. The ranch is a Christian organization that provides a safe, structured environment for children who need it. I have run the Soaring Wings Half Marathon and am excited to participate in their first full marathon. I have signed up to be a Winged Warrior for the race, which means I am collecting donations for the ranch as I am training for the race. I did this for 2 reasons. 1) I want to help this ministry and support the kids and staff. 2) I am a bit overwhelmed by the idea of running a full marathon. Asking people to donate to the ranch adds an extra layer of accountability for me. If you choose to donate, you get a free pass to ask me how my training is going and whether or not I'm fueling my body well (i.e.: Is that your first cupcake this week, Jennifer? Didn't I see you at Sonic earlier today?) And I will try not to won't hit you in the face for asking. ;)

My goal is to raise $1,000 for the Soaring Wings Ranch. It sounds a little daunting, but that is just 100 people giving $10. For me, that basically is couple of grande flat whites with hazelnut syrup. If you would like to support the ranch, you can follow this link and help me raise some money! It's a great way to help kids be in a Christ-centered home and overcome obstacles they face.

I know God has a wonderful plan in the works for my family. While I wait to see the next part unfold, I'm going to run and pray and raise funds for the Soaring Wings Ranch - and watch His plan play out for them, as well. Join me by praying, giving, or even running with me! (Last I saw, there were still about 250 full marathon spots left and a lot of half spots, as well.)

For now, I'm going to rest at the place I keep returning: God is good. He is faithful. And His mercies are new every morning. 

His Mercies Are New Every Morning

Six weeks ago, I sat down to write. My heart was hurting, my eyes were wet, and my arms were empty. This morning, as I sit down to write, my eyes are still wet, but my heart is rejoicing and my arms are full. (Well, metaphorically speaking. It's hard to type while holding a baby. But I'm jumping ahead; let's back up.)

Seven weeks ago, we received a call that we would be getting a newborn girl the next day. An hour before we were going to leave to get her, it fell through. We had a crib set up and a diaper bag packed. All the grandparents were ready. Elisabeth was excited. And at the last minute, we lost what we never had. I was devastated. 

After the initial shock and pain began to subside, God really began to work in my heart and show me a few things. I have been praying for another child in our family for 6 years. Andy and I have always felt called to adopt; many of you know this. But over the last few years, I found myself being very cautious in my prayers. I would ask for what my heart desired and immediately follow it with, "but whatever Your will is, God". It is fabulous to pray for God's will, but I was using it as a safety net. If God didn't answer, it wasn't His will. I didn't pray fervently or with belief, because if I did and He didn't answer the way I wanted, would my faith stand? Could I handle that? I didn't know and I was afraid to find out. So I prayed timidly, safely, and - unfortunately - ineffectively. 

I joined a Bible study back in September, just a couple weeks before all of this happened. I wrestled with whether or not to do it; I knew it would be good, but it was one more time commitment. One more morning I would be out. One more thing on the schedule. It would require sacrifice on my part, but I decided to do it. And now, I am so glad I did. God placed me in this particular study, in my particular small group because He knew I would need it. (Case in point: there is another lady in my group who is using the same agency we are and who knows this process. The ladies who assigned us to our group had no idea we knew each other or what our circumstances were. Never doubt that God works in the details.)

During the lecture one morning, our leader said that prayer doesn't change the purposes of God, but it can sometimes change His actions. You can see this in Abraham's conversation with God regarding Sodom and Gomorrah (Genesis 18). I knew this to be true for the people in the Bible, but I had always been afraid to really try it out; again, what if He said no? I wasn't willing to risk that.

Then one Sunday morning, I was at church and for some reason, the image of Hannah pleading with God at the temple for a baby kept invading my thoughts. All I could think about was how passionately she must have been praying - after all, the priest thought she was drunk! (1 Samuel 1) I knew I wasn't praying that passionately and I knew it was time to change. I began praying over the crib and being gut-level honest with God. I figured He knew anyway, so I might as well voice it. I prayed that God would bring us a baby for our crib and that He would deliver this baby before Elisabeth's birthday. I told God how much I wanted a baby again - to snuggle and feed and kiss. And I asked Him if that was not His will for us, to please change my heart. I prayed. I reminded God of all the women in the Bible to whom He had given babies - babies who weren't expected or thought to be possible - Hannah, Rachel, Leah, Sarah, Elizabeth, Mary - any I could remember. I prayed for us, for a baby, for friends in tough situations. I have prayed in the last 6 weeks like I have never prayed in my life.

A couple of weeks ago, I was taking Elisabeth to school and my heart was just so heavy. I was praying for seemingly impossible situations to change and feeling discouraged and helpless. A Steven Curtis Chapman song ("Believe Me Now") came on; one of the lyrics is "I know all the fears you're feeling now, but do you remember who I AM?" He is the God of the impossible. I kept praying. 

That Sunday, Andy stayed home from church because he wasn't feeling well. He had found an Andy Stanley sermon series, In the Meantime, and we watched one of them that afternoon. In the sermon, Andy talked about Jesus praying right before His arrest and crucifixion. Jesus prayed "Father, if You are willing, take this cup away from Me - nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done." (Luke 22:42) Jesus wasn't using that as His prayer safety net, either. He was praying so passionately, He sweat blood! (Luke 22:44) He trusted God's plan and goodness enough to be able to stand and obey even if God's will wasn't what He wanted. This same thing kept coming up over and over and God had my attention. I kept praying, more boldly, more passionately.

The next afternoon, we got another call. This time, a newborn boy. Twenty-three hours later, we brought him home from the hospital. I want to tell you, too, the route on which God placed us for adoption very rarely leads to newborns. In fact, it is almost unheard of. God is so gracious. I don't know why He chose to answer this prayer the way He did, but I am thankful and humbled. My faith has be bolstered and my prayer life will never be the same. 

God is good. He is faithful. And His mercies are new every morning. This is true today and it was true seven weeks ago. It was true when my heart was on the floor and it is true now when my prayer has been answered.

One of my favorite things about this whole story is that God brought other people along with us to witness our miracle. Yesterday, a good friend told me she was teary when she received the text about our baby. She said, "I went home last Sunday and had a long talk with God about y'all", - and we got a baby two days later! She is just one of many who has prayed with and for us. So many people have been able to see God work in this, and I am so very thankful for that. I pray that others' faith will grow through this.

Please don't walk away from this believing I have said "whatever you pray for, God will give you!" What I am saying is this: take risks in your relationship with Him. Don't be afraid to ask the big things. What God desires is for us to walk closely with Him. He can handle our disappointments and hurts. He can handle it when we don't understand why His answer isn't what we wanted. But I can't know Him or His faithfulness, grace, and mercy fully if I hold Him at arms length, afraid to be disappointed. Please, Jesus, I don't want to go back.

Oh, and Elisabeth's birthday? Yeah, it's November 15th. God not only did the impossible by bringing us a baby, He also did it before my daughter's birthday. He chose to answer a specific prayer; He didn't have to and I am so undeserving. But He did it. And my heart, arms, and eyes are full. 

Our journey is far from over; I know that. But I also know this: God is good - always. God is faithful - always. And, yes, His mercies are new every morning. 

Praising in the Shadows

I'm tired, I'm worn, my heart is heavy
From the work it takes to keep on breathing
I've made mistakes, I've let my hope fail
My soul is crushed from the weight of this world

But I know that You can give me rest
So I cry out with all that I have left

Let me see redemption win

Let me know the struggle ends

That You can mend a heart

That’s frail and torn

I wanna know a song can rise

From the ashes of a broken life

And all that’s dead inside can be reborn

Cause I’m worn

(Worn - Tenth Avenue North)

This is exactly how I feel today. Our family has had a difficult week. Within 24 hours, we went from elation and joy to disappointment and devastation. Behind the smiles you may see, there are tears just waiting in the background. There are heavy hearts. It's kinda different to mourn for something you never even had, but that's where we are right now. And it is hard.

In the middle of the pain, I am speaking {out loud} things I know to be true. In the shadows, it is easy to forget and hard to praise. So I have been reminding myself of the Truth and speaking the words. These are the truths I have been repeating all week long: God is good. God is faithful. His mercies are new every morning. Over and over throughout the day. God is good. God is faithful. His mercies are new every morning. 

Another thing I know to be true is this: God has placed a distinct call on our family. Andy and I have known for ten years. And at this point, we believe we are pursuing that calling in the way in which He has led us. Hebrews 12:1 says, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." In the middle of the hurt, I want to run my race with perseverance. I want to throw off the anger and the bitterness and just run - and run well. 

A couple years ago, Elisabeth's school hosted a 2 mile fun run. Andy and I signed up for it and at the very last possible minute, Elisabeth decided to do it, too. We set out and Elisabeth was so excited. Soon, however, the excitement wore off and our kindergartner decided she had had enough - so she sat down in the middle of the road. After much coaxing, we got her back on her feet and she finished. (Somehow or another, she ended up winning a medal in her age group. I didn't sit down in the road, but I didn't get a medal. Whatever. I'm not bitter.)

God has set this course before us and - as hard and painful as it might be some days - I don't want to sit down in defeat. I may slow down to a crawl, but I refuse to stop or to try to get on someone else's course. When it is over, I want so badly to be able say 2 Timothy 4:7, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 

We all have a calling to answer and a race to run. I want to complete mine. I will press on; there may will be more tears, but I will press on. I want to finish my race with my faith intact. My running mantra? You guessed it.

God is good. God is faithful. And, yes, His mercies ARE new every morning. 

On Noonday and Why It's Fabulous

Welcome to the Fall 2014 Noonday Collection Blog Train! If you missed Laura's post yesterday, you can go read it here and have a chance to win the fabulous new Dainty Paper Beads. This afternoon, you can go read Lane's blog train post here and enter to win a Noonday gift voucher. I get to post this morning and I'm excited. Why? Mainly because I think it's a great way to start my birthday!!! (Truth be told, I'm pretty sure the fall line is my birthday present this year - and I couldn't be happier about that!)

One of my favorite things to do is spot Noonday on family and friends. It's so fun to see a cute scarf or a gorgeous necklace on someone and know that they are wearing something that creates economic opportunity for others around the world.

I talk about Noonday a LOT - on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram - and even in real live conversations! And if you are following the blog train, you've heard many other ambassadors talk about Noonday - why we love it, how cool it is, and all that other stuff. I mean, it's all true, but of course we're going to say that - we're ambassadors! Today, I'd like to let a few others do some "talking" about Noonday. These are real customers and not actors, so you can trust them. ;)

These are my friends Kerri, Courtney, and Brittney (left to right). They have each purchased a few Noonday pieces and have hosted a trunk show together. Kerri says silver hoops are her trademark and loves the clustered hoops because they are sparkly. :) (She just found a new hoop in our fall line to add to her collection - the beautiful Lunar Hoops!) Courtney on the Funky Paper Bead necklace: "I like it because it is colorful and unique just like me. And I like wearing Noonday because each piece has its own story and you think about the artisans who made each piece and their stories." And Brittney (sporting Annie's Feathered earrings and the Serengeti necklace) thinks Noonday is awesome because "it cares for people and the planet at the same time - and is super cute! Statement jewelry shouldn't come at the price of someone's life or our planet's resources."

This is my friend Jennifer and her daughter Sarah. Jennifer is one of my biggest Noonday cheerleaders and Sarah is hilarious. :) They like Noonday because they are able to help people they wouldn't otherwise be able to help and Jennifer likes the paper bead necklaces in particular because they are light and don't weigh her down by the end of the day. (Fashion shouldn't be painful!) Sarah is wearing some of my all time favorites - the Rockstar Orange necklace and the Brightly Wound Color Wrap in coral. 

So that's what just a handful of my friends have to say about Noonday. And since this is my blog, I'm going to add my own two cents. Because I can. Ha! One of the biggest reasons I love Noonday is because it is NOT a charity. Now - listen to me - Noonday does some charitable work, and charities are awesome. Interest-free loans, emergency medical assistance, education scholarships - we do those things. But those are extracurricular, if you will. Noonday Collection's main purpose is to partner with artisans who are already creating beautiful and unique pieces and provide them with a marketplace in which to sell their work. This creates a sustainable and dignified way to earn an income. People in all over the world have an incredible, God-given talent for creating products others will love - but have no way of connecting to the customer. Enter the Noonday Collection home office and the ever-growing sisterhood of ambassadors. Everyone wins. You and I get fantastic accessories and can rest knowing it was produced ethically and fairly. The artisans get the satisfaction of handcrafting pieces that people love and the joy of being able to provide for themselves and their families. 

I love Noonday. I love advocating for our artisans. I love showing others how easy it really is to make a lasting difference in another person's life. So - I may ask you to host a trunk show. I may tell you I have a necklace that made me think of you or a bag that would look fabulous on your arm. Why? I have chosen to be a voice in my community, in my small circle of influence. If you are like me, you can be overwhelmed by the poverty and trafficking in the world. You hear about it and want to help, but it seems so big and so scary and so out of reach. The unknowns and enormity of the issues are crippling. But it doesn't have to be. Yes, there are many big things that can and need to be done. But I, along with all my sister Noonday ambassadors, want you to know this: even little changes/purchases/decisions make a huge difference. That is why I am an ambassador and why I have chosen to be a voice - and why I think EVERYONE would look fantastic in our new Black Diamond earrings. Or one of my favorite necklaces from the new line, Liberte. I'm planning on wearing Liberte quite a bit this football season - with a few other pieces, of course!

Also pictured: Entwined and Tagua Seed bracelets and Phoenix earrings

Because I love you so much and because I think everyone needs Noonday, I am giving away a $25 Noonday Collection gift voucher to one of my readers! To enter to win, simply comment on this blog with your favorite Noonday piece. For an extra entry, share this blog post on your Facebook wall (comment and let me know you did it!). A winner will be selected on Monday, August 25th. 

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Feel free to go to my website - www.jenniferhostetler.noondaycollection.com - and check out all of our new line (and some not-so-new favorites)! Happy Noonday shopping!!!

Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down...

Welcome to the next stop on the Noonday Blog Train! I hope you have enjoyed reading about Noonday and my fellow ambassadors - and the give-aways, of course! (My give-away and the links to the blogs before and after this one are at the end of today's post. But surely you won't skip to the end, right? Of course not!) Today, I'm going to tell you the story of how I heard about and decided to partner with Noonday by becoming an ambassador. Some of you have heard parts of this, but just humor me. :) Let's start at the very beginning...

The beginning of this story takes us back to November 2012. I went to Dallas to the Right Now conference with a few friends. While God used literally EVERY session to speak exactly what I needed to hear, one session in particular stood out. Some chick with whom I was totally unfamiliar was the speaker - Jen Hatmaker. (Little did I know I would become VERY FAMILIAR with her or that God was going to use her and her story to make a rather large impact on my life - and on my family.) I don't even remember the title of the breakout session she led. I just remember the content: she felt like she spent her time serving saved people and blessing blessed people. And I sat there nodding my head and thinking, "Me, too..." 

Here's the deal: I wasn't doing anything wrong. The problem was this - by the end of the day/week/month, I had NOTHING left to give ANYONE. At the time of the conference, I was holding down my regular part time job and an interim full time job, and was just beginning to get my feet wet as the head of a seasonal ministry at our church. The nature of my job had me busy most of the week and every weekend. My husband teaches school. (And if you really think that means he only works until 3 in the afternoon Monday-Friday 9 months out of the year, I triple dog dare you to say that to a teacher or a teacher's spouse. For real.) On top of the regular teacher stuff, his school had just switched to block scheduling, so EVERYONE was in upheaval. Also, our daughter had just begun kindergarten - her first time to be anywhere five days a week. We had absolutely no margin as far as time or energy went. 

In her session, Jen talked about how her family had begun to push back on some of the things that demanded and took her family's attention/time/resources/etc. Thus began her 7 experiment - a deliberate cutting back of excess in 7 areas. I bought her book, 7, and devoured it. In January 2013, Andy and I began our own 7 experiment. It sounds all cool and spiritual, but let me tell you - it was HARD. Very hard. And very worth it. What we discovered over the next several months of our 7 experiment is that when you create margin in your life - in any area - all the sudden you can hear and see the things God is trying to reveal to you. Jen Hatmaker isn't a magician and 7 isn't a magic spell. But when you create space and are able to REALLY hear God, your life will change. 

By March, my heart was restless. I knew I wanted to be doing something different, reaching out to a group that didn't look/live like me. I also knew I couldn't add anything else to my schedule and still maintain a healthy family life. Andy and I attended a Lifeway Festival of Marriage and I met a Noonday Collection ambassador - Cara Coleman. I had never heard of Noonday, but as I learned about this company that creates dignified employment opportunities for artisans all over the world, I fell in love. I asked Cara to come do a trunk show at my house and by the time we had it, I was ready to sign up to be an ambassador. 

I resigned from my job at the beginning of May. (Mind you, I didn't resign to BE an ambassador; I resigned to be able to spend more time taking care of the home front and to be ready when DHS calls and says they have a child for our family to adopt. We're still waiting on that to happen, but we're as ready as we can be when it does!) As I resigned and finished out my job, I jumped on the Noonday Collection wagon. I view Noonday as not only a job, but a ministry. Through Noonday, I am able to:

        *educate myself and those around me about the possibilities of fair trade and the realities modern day slavery.

        *partner with hostesses and ambassadors I wouldn't have had the opportunity to meet and work with otherwise.

        *help families raise money for their adoptions.

        *help create a marketplace for handmade items that gives people around the world a job that enables them to care for their families and keep them intact.

I believe God introduced me to Noonday Collection as a way to be the hands and feet of Christ - to the people right here around me as well as to those spread out all over the world. I love sharing about the mission and work of Noonday with others. I love telling them that, really, one purchase does matter. I love getting to share that one of the artisan groups we work with has Bible study every morning and people are not only earning an income but are hearing the Gospel! 

So - when you see me at church, school, Target, wherever - I might tell you all about my beloved Kismet bag from India or my Orange Blossom bracelet (affectionately referred to by me as my Bob Newhart bracelet). I might invite you to a trunk show or even ask you to host one. I might tell you I have some fabulous ideas for Mother's Day for your mom/wife/grandmother. Why? Because this work is important. Because there are real faces of real people whose lives have literally been changed because of your purchases. Because one choice really CAN make a difference.

My 7 year old daughter absolutely loves Noonday Collection - and not just because of the fun jewelry she always begs to wear! She gets it. How do I know? This is how I know:

(It says "Noonday is a blessing from God. You are serving God with Noonday!" She wrote that all on her own and brought it to me. I just love that kid.)

My friend and fellow ambassador, Ariel Allen, and I are on a mission to make Noonday a household name in Northeast Arkansas. You can learn a little about us on our websites (www.jenniferhostetler.noondaycollection.com and www.arielallen.noondaycollection.com). We would love to partner with you and hang out with your friends at a trunk show! While you are checking your calendar and making a list of all your friends and neighbors, make sure you enter my give-away! I will be giving a gorgeous Marina clutch - made {with love} by a group of artisans in India with upcycled VHS tapes - to one lucky reader! To enter, simply leave a comment under this post OR on my Facebook post where I have shared it. Bonus: for an extra entry in the drawing, share it to YOUR Facebook page! My beautiful 7 year old Noonday Elf will draw the winner's name next Thursday, March 27th. 

Make sure you go read Emily's post from yesterday and Katie's post tomorrow!

Thanks for dropping by and I hope to meet you here again soon!

This Time, I Will Praise The Lord

Leah. One of the most pitied women in Scripture. The older, less desirable sister. Given in marriage disguised as the younger, beautiful sister, Rachel. In a seemingly unending race to be the best and most loved with Rachel. I can't read her story without feeling her pain. 

Genesis 29:31-33: "When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, He opened her womb; but Rachel was unable to conceive. Leah conceived, gave birth to a son, and named him Reuben (he has seen my misery), for she said, 'The Lord has seen my affliction; surely my husband will love me now'. She conceived again, gave birth to a son, and said, 'The Lord has heard that I am unloved and has given me this son also.' So she named him Simeon (he has heard). She conceived again, gave birth to a son, and said, 'At last my husband will become attached to me because I have borne three sons for him.' Therefore he was named Levi (he will join)."

Leah wasn't happy in her circumstances. Her relationships were broken and screwy. She desperately wanted them to change, as is shown even in her boys' names. She was unsettled and longed for approval and love.

The last week or so, I have been wrestling with something I've wrestled in the past: being disappointed by another person. This is something we all deal with, be it a spouse or a child, an employer or employee, a friend or a coworker. I have allowed it to consume me. All the emotions - hurt, anger, sadness - would just take over. I'd plead with God to fix it, remove it, or whatever else I felt justified in asking regarding "it". It would weigh me down and cripple me for days, sometimes weeks, at a time.

But this time is different. I was reading in Jesus Calling (Sarah Young) yesterday (catching up a bit, to be perfectly honest) - and came across this: "Trust and thankfulness will get you through this day.Trust protects you from worrying and obsessing. Thankfulness keeps you from criticizing and complaining: those 'sister sins' that so easily entangle you." (Jesus Calling, February 21) 

Back to Leah. Genesis 29:35 says, "And she conceived again, gave birth to a son, and said, 'This time I will praise the Lord.' Therefore she named him Judah (to praise)."

You know what? I have tried to fix things on my own. I have taken it upon myself to inflict punishment on others. You know what else? Those things don't work. Maybe they hide the issue for a while or make me feel "better" or in control. But they don't work in the long run. Only the Holy Spirit works in the long run. 

This time, I will praise the Lord.

I decided yesterday morning I was not going to let another person's decisions or actions interfere with my relationship with Christ. I wasn't going to dwell on the situation. I wasn't going to give in to anger. I wanted to just fix my eyes on Christ, forgive, and move forward. The hurt was still there, but my heart was at peace because it was resting in my Savior Who will never let me down or disappoint. (And of course, as always seems to happen, God gave one more push in this direction through last night's sermon. Okay, God, I hear you!) 

A friend said something the other day that really resonated with me. When someone hurts us or disappoints us, we have the opportunity to practice being like Jesus. We can forgive and wipe the slate clean. 

So here's the deal: I am human and I offend and sin, too. I have been forgiven by my Savior. Who am I to withhold forgiveness from others? It is never my job to "teach someone a lesson" or to punish others for sin. (It IS my job to discipline my child, but that's another thing altogether.) It is not my job to hold something over another person's head or to manipulate relationships based on what I think I deserve. If I look in the mirror, I can see all too clearly what I deserve. Christ has withheld that from me and offered forgiveness instead. Praise Jesus! As my friend so perfectly put it, I want to practice being like Jesus. It is my job to forgive, to show grace as I have been shown grace. 

I will be hurt again, by many people. It's the nature of our fallen world. And I will hurt others and need to ask their forgiveness and grace. From now on, I want my response to be, "This time I will praise the Lord." Every day. Every time. I can choose to praise. I can choose to let God use my hurts and failures to grow me in my walk with Him. This time I will praise the Lord. 

"Let the ruins come to life
in the beauty of Your name,
rising up from the ashes.
God forever You reign.

And my soul will find refuge
in the shadow of Your wings.
I will love You forever
and forever I'll sing"

Glorious Ruins - Hillsong
Hear the whole song here